Candy is bad for you. All moms know that.
So when my kids begged for Dum Dums after breakfast last week? I grabbed our entire stash of various stored and leftover candy—a gallon Ziploc bag full—and hurled it straight into the kitchen trash bin.
Not because we’re cutting out sugar. Obviously, any mother who hoards a sack of candy in the first place is a pushover for moderation. Plus I like to snitch a mini Snickers every once in a while.
In our house, though, candy has become bad for the soul.
“Mom, can I have these?” My five-year-old pinched a pack of Smarties between her thumb and forefinger and flashed a pleading smile.
“No, it’s too early for candy.”
“But I ate both of my pancakes!”
“I’m so glad. We don’t eat candy at breakfast time. Put it away.”
“Mom?” My eight-year-old skipped into the kitchen holding a sucker in her hand. “Can I have this? I ate a really good breakfast.”
“No! Where did you girls get the idea that you can eat candy before school?”
“You always let us have candy after we eat our healthy food!”
“At dinnertime, sweetheart. This is breakfast. I’m not sending you off to school with candy in your system. It’s too early for sweets.”
I’ll spare you the gruesome details, but in a nutshell what followed was a snit of classic proportions—complete with stomping feet, slamming doors, and a few grumpy words tossed in my direction.
Over what? A couple suckers and a candy roll. Ridiculous.
In that moment, though, I realized those sweets had become something greater. Something far more damaging than sugar and red dye #40.
Idols.
“For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also” (Matthew 6:21).
What seizes your child’s attention and adoration? Is there any THING—an object, activity, mindset or goal—that causes your sons and daughters to risk relationships with people, obedience to God, and their very own well-being?
Let’s call it what it is. The Bible says anything that competes with God and causes us to throw his commands out the window is nothing more than a worthless idol, a weak replacement for the rightful focal point of our worship.
My daughter wanted that candy so much, she was willing to break God’s commandment—honor your mother and father (Exodus 20:12)—in order to fight for it. Not to mention a long list of other biblical principles, like “be kind” and “demonstrate self-control” and “Thou shalt not beg, whine, or bicker before Mommy chugs her morning swig of orange juice and anxiety meds.” Okay, that one’s not really in the Bible—but I think we all agree it should be.
The point is, I did what I had to do.
I tossed the candy—in order to prove to my kids that nothing (especially Dum Dums, hello) is worth compromising their souls.
“Dear children, keep yourselves from idols” (1 John 5:21).
After my daughter reclaimed her senses, I knelt to eye level and launched a heart-to-heart lesson.
“Do you realize what happened here, sweetheart? God tells you to honor your parents and to show love. Yet your candy was more important than being kind to me. It was more important than obeying God. So what does that mean? What did you let your candy become?”
She cast her eyes to floor and spoke softly. “An idol.”
My girl knows her Bible.
And yes, sometimes she chooses to blow it off anyway.
Just like her mother. Sound familiar? Praise God for his grace.
“Hey,” I squeezed my daughter’s hand. “I have a secret handshake for us.” She looked up and smiled. I stretched my index finger onto her wrist and tapped each syllable of our now favorite code message.
“I love you more than candy.”
She tapped it back and giggled. Now each day, on the road to school or after I’ve tucked her into bed at night, she reaches for my hand and taps. The message applies to whatever idol we’re tackling that day, for example, “I love you more than Pinterest” works just as well. So does “I love you more than TV” and “I love you more than Cheetos.” Regardless of your vice, the meaning is the same.
I love you more than idols.
Our daily reminder to put God first.
It’s sweeter than all the Smarties a gallon bag can hold.
Blessings,
Becky
This is a good one, Becky!
Thanks, friend. 🙂
This is great! My kids have this problem with fast food. We live 15 minutes from town and they often think they will starve if I don’t just make a drive-thru run instead of driving ALL the way home and then COOK! I have never thought about it that way, but yes, they have made an idol of fast food!
I can relate to this! Kind of sad that chicken nuggets trump my home cooking every time… 😉
“I love you more than candy.” That one made me tear up. My girls’ biggest idol is their iPad. Mine, my phone. I put it down after dinner, and read and played outside with them. That time was precious!!
Ugh, I can really relate to that, Caroline. My idol is my laptop… my constant connection to the electronic world. Just this morning my daughter and I had another “idol” conversation that ended in the secret handshake. We both wound up giggling. I think the lessons are actually getting through!
Profound lessons from everyday happenings. I love this one Becky, going to teach my boys about “idols” and learn some more about them myself.
God speaks loudly in the everyday, right, Ugochi? Blessings to you, sister!
It’s always a “treat” {wink, wink} to visit your place, Becky! You are such an amazing mom! I wish I had been so wise when I was raising little ones. I certainly could have had a blog called “Messy Motherhood”–but I’m not sure I would have enough wisdom to share from those days! So I always appreciate all of you mommy bloggers for speaking into those situations. No more idols! You preach it, girlfriend!
I just love your comments, Beth! You make me smile every time. You must be a writer or something. 😉
I need to follow your lead. We have the same problem at our house. Thank you for this today!
Now THAT is sweet! 😉
My boys got this way for a little while with rewards. It got to the point where they were shocked to not get a reward just for doing what they were supposed to. We had to nip that in the bud.
Aw! That was so sweet! My stepdaughter is 14 and cannot go five minutes with her phone… I think I might share this with her. She tried to give up Instagram and snapchat for lent.
What a great lesson! One I think I will borrow! Stopping by from Imparting Grace.
Great post! I love that you taught them that food and sugar can become an idol. Nothing will ever satisfy us like Jesus. 🙂