Becky Kopitzke

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Why I Stopped Folding My Underwear

May 19, 2014

Do you ever complain there just aren’t enough hours in the day? Me, too.

But I’m starting to realize most of the stuff taxing my schedule is my own darn fault.

why I stopped folding my underwear

“Can I fold this laundry?” Our babysitter pointed to a basket of my daughters’ clothes and offered her motherly help.

“Oh my goodness,” I blushed at the piles of unfinished housework sitting stark naked on the living room floor. “I’m so sorry I left these baskets here for you to trip over. I just didn’t get to them last night.”

“Oh now,” she dismissed my jabber with a flick of her wrist. “You know I was a working mom once, too.” (Our sitter is a retired teacher. Love her.) “It’s the least I can do.” She grabbed a pair of princess undies, checked the label and flattened them into a stack of size 4’s.

Flattened. Unfolded. Took her .3 seconds.

“You don’t fold the underwear?” I asked—not so much a question, but a statement of bewilderment. Epiphany. Awe.

“No.” She smiled then crinkled her nose. “Do you?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

Uhhhhh.

“I. . . don’t. . . know.”

Why DO I fold the underwear? I mean, it’s not like anybody ever looks in our skivvy drawers but us. And must I see a tidy arrangement of britches staring back at me?

No. Not as much as I’d prefer to cut my laundry folding time in half.

Hmmm.

Think about it. What else do we do—out of habit or compulsion or ignorance, even—that sucks up our precious time unnecessarily? Maybe you don’t fold your underwear, but do you alphabetize your spices? Dust behind the sofa? Check e-mail ten times a day when once or twice will do?

It’s fair to ask ourselves the question.

Why?

I read somewhere that God gave us exactly 24 hours in a day, and if we can’t accomplish everything on our to-do lists within his parameters, then we’re probably adding our own agenda items to God’s plan. The key is discernment—between what God asks and what we demand of ourselves.

I’m pretty sure God never told me to fold the underwear.

“He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God,” (Micah 6:8).

This underwear enlightenment is life-changing for me. In order to choose what’s important over what’s urgent—what’s best over what’s merely good or popular or (hello!) ridiculous—I must start giving up tasks that don’t matter.

Like hand-washing the sippy cups. Volunteering for another committee, which somebody else could handle just as well. Balancing the checkbook when my husband already keeps track of every dime in graphs and charts and algorithms. Let that be his important so I can steal back time for other things I deem as my important.

My photo albums, long neglected.

The classic novel I’ve been meaning to read to my kids.

That elusive quiet night to snuggle next to my man with a bowl of popcorn and a romantic comedy on DVD—no computers, no phones, no chores to block our way.

Those are the priorities I want to set free. They are the blessings I want to hear above the din. But in order to extract them from the rubble of too much to do, I must pluck lesser tasks off the pile.

What about you? Is it time to pluck your pile, too?

When our babysitter finished folding the laundry and placed everything neatly back in the basket, she poked her head around my office door. “Can I put these away for you?”

Well . . . let me think about that.

Uh, YES! And I’ll add five minutes to the priorities bank. Then tonight my girls and I can cash them in on our first chapter of The Secret Garden.

This is SO worth a rumpled underwear drawer. Next I just might stop ironing the sheets.

Just kidding. I don’t really iron my sheets.

Do you?

Yikes.

Just a friendly suggestion—you can probably let that one go.

Blessings,
Becky

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Filed Under: Marriage, Mom Mess-ups, Parenting, Personal Growth & Faith, Priorities Tagged With: christian parenting, contentment, devotion, devotional, faith, family, housework, identity in Christ, living in the moment, marriage, mom guilt, motherhood, parenting, priorities, true success, urgent vs important

Comments

  1. Alicia says

    May 19, 2014 at 12:57 pm

    Oh, I LOVE this. You’ve just set me free, friend. In fact, I’ve got piles of underwear heaped in the laundry basket right now that I’m gonna walk right upstairs and dump in drawers. Yes, I said DUMP. Ahh… freedom! You’re awesome. Can you hear me cheer from across the lake? Happy Monday!

    • Becky says

      May 19, 2014 at 2:43 pm

      I hear you cheering, my friend! Hugs over the water!

  2. Shauna Letellier says

    May 19, 2014 at 1:04 pm

    Oh, bless you! I haven’t folded underwear in YEARS!! I have also never ironed sheets (what in the…?), and I have recently “let” my boys fold all their own laundry. T-shirts are always “folded” in a wrinkled ball, but after they sweat in them, they’re nice and limp at day’s end. So it works out 🙂

    • Becky says

      May 19, 2014 at 2:43 pm

      I’ve been thinking about assigning laundry baskets to the kiddos! Sometimes they like to fold for fun… I wonder if the fun factor will disappear as soon as it’s an expectation. Welcome to the world of chores, my daughters. 🙂

  3. Virginia says

    May 19, 2014 at 2:39 pm

    Oh my! Not folding undies? I think my man would die. 😉 What else can I get away with not folding? Surely I’m taking things too far if I just stop folding clothes altogether. I’d have a lot more time to sit outside and read if I didn’t fold any clothes. Or wash them for that matter. No more laundry for me, we’ll just buy new. Hahahahahahahahaha.

    • Becky says

      May 19, 2014 at 2:41 pm

      Now THAT is a dreamy idea, Virginia! I like it, ha ha!

  4. Sally Ferguson says

    May 19, 2014 at 6:52 pm

    Wow! That caught my attention; I probably add my own agenda items to God’s plan. And I know that, because my to do list is always longer than what’s realistic!

  5. Kathryn Shirey says

    May 20, 2014 at 5:37 am

    Love this! It’s never occurred to me NOT to fold underwear, but I’m going to try it this week! Love the idea to let go of those little time drains – the things we do just because we’ve always done them or we don’t want to accept the help that’s offered.

  6. Jill Beran says

    May 20, 2014 at 10:15 am

    Thank you for sharing!!! Oh there are things I need to let go of and this is exactly something God has been talking to me about. Thank you for sharing so honestly today and encouraging me as well!! Blessings!

  7. Joe Pote says

    May 20, 2014 at 11:05 pm

    “…if we can’t accomplish everything on our to-do lists within his parameters, then we’re probably adding our own agenda items to God’s plan.”

    Interesting way of looking at time management…

    Thanks for sharing!

  8. Elvira says

    May 21, 2014 at 1:20 am

    I’ve never thought of folding undies until my granny-in-law, who loves everything involving laundry and ironing, started ironing them (!!) and my undie drawer smiled at me every morning. Luckily she still does, but I can’t bother. The boxers of my husband though, folding them is just a pain, I never get them as regular as granny and I hate it! 😀
    I’m afraid things are going to change drastically when the moment comes granny cannot do this anymore.

  9. Ugochi says

    May 21, 2014 at 5:28 am

    This made me laugh a little, though it is a very important matter.
    I try to make sure God has all my time. Anything that will take me away from God and my family, or weary me to the point where I become cranky and unpleasant, I leave it undone.

  10. Kenya G. Johnson says

    May 21, 2014 at 7:35 am

    This was cute. I don’t fold my underwear either. But I fold my son’s and my husband’s. Now isn’t THAT crazy. What’s wrong with me?

  11. Beth says

    May 21, 2014 at 8:46 am

    Yes, Becky, this is what I’m grappling with too. I am trying to be discerning about what is really necessary for me to carve out time to do it. It’s so easy to let “everything” that needs to be done or that catches my eye grab my attention and time, But I am so far behind due to my medical treatment and backlog of important work that I too must make the painful decision to “let some things go.” My house may not be as picture perfect as other wives, but I’m working on ordering the inside of my heart/relationships as well and that takes time! Love your titles too! They always catch my attention. 🙂

  12. Rachel from Love Built To Last says

    May 22, 2014 at 1:40 pm

    I actually do fold my underwear! But, I’m not yet married and don’t yet have children. There are other unnecessary stresses I have let go, though.

  13. sue donaldson says

    May 24, 2014 at 5:59 pm

    I missed the folding gene, so this doesn’t make the to-do list very often. putting it all away can be equally laborious. I’ll bake two pies over either. my favorite advice comes from Utmost/ OChambers: “Trust God and do the next thing.” Sometimes that’s folding and putting away. (:

  14. Shell says

    May 27, 2014 at 11:08 am

    I wonder what it is that I do that I really don’t need to be doing that is sucking away my time. I’m going to try to be really aware over the next couple days and figure it out.

  15. Richella Parham says

    May 27, 2014 at 9:17 pm

    Touché, my friend!

    Oh, the things I do that aren’t really within the purview of what God would have me doing. . . .l

    Thanks for the call to freedom!

  16. Kaylene Yoder says

    June 5, 2014 at 8:46 am

    Folding kids undies & ironing sheets…never have, never will! 🙂 I will also never starch my curtains and rarely match socks! I buy a different kind for each child so they always have the same kind, just not always the same color! Thanks for confirming that God’s time is more valuable than all that! *smile* Blessings!

  17. Teresa says

    October 25, 2014 at 10:34 pm

    Love this! I read somewhere once that you also should not waste time turning t-shirts right side out (if they aren’t already) when they come out of the laundry. Instead just do a simple fold and then when you get one out to wear turn it right side out before putting it on. Saves time folding. Made sense to me. Going to rethink folding the underwear. Hope I have enough room in my drawer to lay them flat 😉 .

  18. Donna Reidland says

    December 20, 2014 at 12:11 pm

    Loved your post and can’t wait to read some more of them. I’m a grandmother (& great-grandmother-yikes!). I gave up many things through the years, but as an always-trying-to-reform do-er, I’m always fighting the urge to do things that don’t matter.

    Thanks for sharing!

    • Becky says

      December 22, 2014 at 8:41 am

      Thank you for reading, Donna! Blessings to you and your family!

  19. Brittany at Equipping Godly Women says

    January 24, 2015 at 8:46 pm

    This is great. I know for a fact my day is too full of things that don’t need to be there. Thanks for the reminder to continue kicking them out.

Trackbacks

  1. Nobody Notices When I Sweep the Floor says:
    October 31, 2014 at 8:45 pm

    […] Encouragement from the archives. You might also like and Oh But I Used to Work in Marketing, On Dreams, Contentment and Spaghetti, and Why I Stopped Folding My Underwear. […]

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If you love your kids but you sometimes forget to feed them lunch, if you're crazy about your husband but some days you want to set his hunting gear on fire, and if you adore Jesus with your whole heart yet you mess up time and time again, then you and I are friends already.

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