Becky Kopitzke

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Queen of the Castle: A Fresh Perspective on Housework

May 28, 2012

“She senses the worth of her work, is in no hurry to call it quits for the day. She’s skilled in the crafts of home and hearth, diligent in homemaking,” (Proverbs 31:18–19, MSG).

Last week, I spent a sunny Monday afternoon scrubbing my kitchen floor. It was delightful.

Why?

Because I was alone.

Most days, I have helpers—my children. I sweep; they beg to hold the dustpan. I fold laundry; they play rowboat with the baskets. I wash a pot and put it away; they pull it from the cupboard again to stir imaginary soup.

Have you ever held a toilet brush in one arm and a baby in the other? Me, too.

Monday, however, was different. Monday was rare. The little one napped while big sister was at school. In those odd, quiet hours, I usually feel pressured to relax and read a book or do something that counts as “me time.” But you should’ve seen the sticky mystery blotches on my kitchen tile—like Venus fly traps for socks and stray cereal crumbs. The urge to clean took over. I had to scrub the floor.

At first my strategy was to get the job over with as fast as possible so I could move on to something indulgent. But as I whirled the mop across the room, it occurred to me, this is something indulgent. No little legs scurried around me; no sweet voices begged to play outside. I heard only the hum of the dishwasher and my own random thoughts. So I scrubbed and scoured and sashayed through that kitchen like I owned the place.

Wait a second. I do own this place. Isn’t that fantastic?! I’m not the maid, for crying out loud. I am the queen.

And this house is my castle.

When was the last time you viewed your home as a prized possession rather than a chore? I honestly can’t remember. Somehow in the daily grind of childcare, cooking, clutter and spills, my castle lost its magic. It became a loud, unceasing mess to maintain, instead of what it should be—my safe haven.

I want my haven back. So I’m claiming a fresh perspective on housework.

Dusting is optional. But loving my family is not, and housework is one of the ways I care for them. From now on, I’ll imagine every swipe of the dust mitt is like blowing a kiss.

Wiping bathrooms is gross. But clean tap water sure is a blessing. And so are piles of dishes and bags of groceries to unload and a thousand other conveniences that millions of people in this world live without.

Laundry is no party. But sorting colors with two little girls can be a rollicking good time—especially when a toddler dances around wearing big sister’s underwear on her head and we all burst into giggles.

Which brings me back to my helpers. Housework might be more challenging with children underfoot. But isn’t that exactly what I love about this life? I have a family sharing my space, praise God. They make this house a home.

A safe haven.

Our castle.

And yes, it’s true—I am the queen.

If this post encouraged you, please feel free to pass it on. You might also like Sticky, Smelly, Dirty, Sandy Grass, and When You Don’t Feel Like Doing Your Job.

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Filed Under: Chores, Growing Pains, Homemaking, Household, Parenting, Raising Young Kids

Comments

  1. Elisha Kemp says

    May 28, 2012 at 12:30 pm

    Thank you for sharing this! It is such a blessing to stay at home and be with my children , and sometimes the floors can wait to be swept so I can take them on a walk and enjoy the gorgeous weather.

    http://www.gratefulwithtwo.com

    • Becky says

      May 29, 2012 at 1:29 am

      Yes, a blessing – I agree completely!

  2. Ashley Ditto says

    May 28, 2012 at 4:15 pm

    I always love your posts Becky, they help me so much! Wonderful!!!

    • Becky says

      May 29, 2012 at 1:29 am

      I hope all is well in your household today, Ashley!

  3. Erica {let why lead} says

    May 28, 2012 at 5:23 pm

    Funny how the people who MAKE our houses home often feel like the very people that keep it from feeling like one. I am constantly reminding myself that they’re not *trying* to tear the house apart; it’s just what they do. 🙂

    Thanks for the reminder to be the queen of the castle—to love the mess and the clean, the quiet and the crazy. You are a wonderful writer!

    • Becky says

      May 29, 2012 at 1:31 am

      Ha – yes, it’s not their master plan to destroy our space, is it? After all, it’s their space, too! Thank you for your kind words, Erica!

  4. Lynn says

    May 29, 2012 at 6:09 pm

    Well happy cleaning, from one queen of the castle to another! Loved reading your post, and picturing your cherub dancing around with underwear on her head 🙂

  5. Michy (lovingourjourney.com) says

    May 29, 2012 at 6:22 pm

    This was great…I get so frusturated with chores sometimes and need to view it differently…and truly don’t get why I can have that urge to suddenly clean something (else) while the laundry is still waiting…
    Thanks for sharing,
    Michy

  6. Alana of Domestic Bliss Diaries says

    May 30, 2012 at 1:33 pm

    What a wonderful way to look at house work. It’s not a curse. It’s a blessing. And, yes, I am queen of my castle! 😉

    Stopping by from Women Living Well.

    http://www.domesticblissdiaries.com

  7. Marie Wreath says

    May 31, 2012 at 2:13 pm

    Just wonderful! So happy to read about your re-inspiration. I love it. One of my favorite quotes to motivate me for jobs around the farm is this: “Work is lvoe made visible.” Khalil Gibran. Happy Home-keeping to you! xo

  8. Tracey says

    May 31, 2012 at 3:13 pm

    This was a treasure to read, thank you!

  9. Liberty says

    May 31, 2012 at 5:43 pm

    great post – just what I needed!
    blessings
    http://bit.ly/gjDQOS

  10. Rosilind Jukic says

    June 1, 2012 at 7:54 am

    What a great post. I have piles of laundry and dishes to do today – oh – and Ironing. So, I’m keeping this in mind as I create a clean castle for my family. Thank you for this new perspective! Popping over from Proverbs 31. – A Little R & R http://jukiczr.blogspot.com

  11. Donna says

    June 3, 2012 at 12:31 pm

    What a great post. It is good to be Queen. Thank you.

  12. Richella says

    June 6, 2012 at 11:05 pm

    Hip, hip, huzzah! God save the Queen!

    I love this post, Becky. Thank you so much for linking it to Grace at Home! 🙂

  13. hallie says

    January 14, 2013 at 1:47 pm

    When so often my husband reminds me that a man’s home is his castle and place of retreat, with four little ones under six I often feel more like the scullery maid than the queen! Thanks for the reminder that this is my castle too!

Trackbacks

  1. My Daughter, My Slave says:
    November 4, 2013 at 3:43 am

    […] this post encouraged you, please share it. You might also like Queen of the Castle: A Fresh Perspective on Housework, Am I the Maid Around Here? and Cut Me Some Slack, Little […]

  2. If You Were in My House Today says:
    March 3, 2014 at 6:05 am

    […] socks as you cross the kitchen floor. Then you’d lift your foot and find a pile of crumbs that I may or may not sweep before my children plow their Tigger riding train right through […]

  3. We Quarantined the Toys . . . Now What? says:
    February 4, 2015 at 2:44 pm

    […] have freedom to spread their LEGOs and Hot Wheels and coloring books galore, while I sit like a fat queen in my leather office chair basking in the direct sunlight of a window—dressed in chic new linen […]

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If you love your kids but you sometimes forget to feed them lunch, if you're crazy about your husband but some days you want to set his hunting gear on fire, and if you adore Jesus with your whole heart yet you mess up time and time again, then you and I are friends already.

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